THE JOY OF FRIENDSHIP
The human nature among other things possesses two great natural goods: marriage and friendship. They are both natures’ gifts for human beings. God created man that he may exist and live, but if a human person is not to remain solitary (as some do), there must be friendship. Man does not survive as such in isolation. He who tries to forbid all friendly conversations and antics must be aware that he breaks the ties of all human relationships. Friendship is won and is not by chance. In a sustainable platform, faithfulness, trust, veracity, love, humility and stability are the so to speak; the most significant qualities of friendship and even in marriage. Friendship being part of our existential heritage as finite beings goes a long way to reshaping each individual human person in relation to other, man is not only a being for itself only. As material beings, we can’t deny friendship in our lives even if our relative experiences have left some unwarranted marks in the beingness of our being. Such experiences cannot plunge man into a denial of friendship. A very sure foundation among other things is to base our friendship on the love of God. God is the initiator of the human family and as a matter of fact, he is to be given the prime position in our friendship activities.


It is worthy of note that not everyone you encountered is or will be your friend. Nature has a way of balancing everything, a sure way to failure in friendship and in life at large is to try always to please everyone. This can as well mean; building in another persons’ foundation. You are most natural when you are free or most free when you are natural. Inauthentic existence leads no man to a desired end. Those who are to be with you will do that irrespective of whatever that may happen or have happened to you. This write-up encourages you to be natural or original because whatever that is hidden shall one day be made known (Quid quid latent aparebit) and by then things may spoil or have spoilt which may endanger your friendship or marriage. You don’t need to be afraid of losing people. Life is larger than logic as I have observed, inconsistency or human weaknesses if not checked can cause friendship to change into treachery, baseness and even hatred therefore, I urge you to seek the basis of faithfulness and stability which are strong pillars in marriage and friendship in God. Cicero captured this very well when he said that: friendship is an agreement on all human and divine things, with benevolence and love, also encompassed the dominion of the divine.


Any marriage and friendship established in God gets to a good end. It is important re-iterate here what TD Jakes stated: “when people walk from you, let them go. Your destiny is never tied to anyone who leaves you, and it doesn’t mean that they are bad people. It just means that their part in your story is over”. Nothing is ever lost in God when we make him the centre of our being and even in our relationship. Friendship in marriage is a veritable tool for those who know the true meaning or value of friendship. Remain resolute in life for it is not always perfect, there is a possibility for a problem. The problem is not the end, but it’s the beginning of a different life.

KINGSLEY.K. ONYISHI. PJPS